I: Steven Cunio

Words

Keywords: pain, loss, bereavement, relived, living, broken, numb, body, abuse, screams, soul, nothing, alone, trench, despair

Background: Xmas 2005, boxing day morning. Once again not seen my son on Christmas day, nor heard from him as per our worthless court order. This year it hurts worse as I hear his step dad being called father, a title he would deserve if he put mine and David's relationship first; David hasn't called again. My late dad's birthday follows and my spirits are low. The facade of their 'perfect' family unit haunts me as I experience the loss of what should have been mine in the face of the abuse that I left for the sake of my son. Alone, I weep, write...


I Cannot Describe

I cannot describe the
pain of constant loss;
Bereavement relived
again and again and again..
So much pain my
body shuts down;
My head, my legs, my heart
broken and numb.

No more abuse
my body screams out;
No more abuse!

My soul withers to nothing
and my spirit dampens;
Alone, trodden and muddied it lies
In the trench of my despair.

Copyfreely December 26th, 2004


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